One of the first things is listening, when there’s something going on in my life I just want somebody to hear me. You know really listen. When i’m explaining what’s going wrong or how i’m feeling, I don’t want the person i’m talking with to be preparing to say something. I just want you to just be taking it in.
I think too many times people get caught up in trying to solve the problem and wanting to fix whatever is wrong with their friend. Glancing over the fact that this is an emotional situation, it’s not about trying to solve it, it’s just about having someone hear me out.
When someone listens it can make all the difference in the world honestly people base a lot of their behaviors on how they believe the world sees them and how they see the world. If they see the world as uninterested in them, uncaring, not listening, then they act accordingly. That means individuals can be closed off, untrusting, cold and uninterested in creating relationships with anybody.
One of the next important things is to notice, if we’re friends you need to notice when i’m off. As a friend you should be able to notice when something’s just not right. That may be difficult in the beginning of relationships but as time goes on you’ll start to know your friend and you’ll start to be able to realize when things just aren’t right. When you notice, you ask you say something and a lot of the times I may say nothing is wrong but there could be something wrong.
Most of us out there probably do that and usually this is actually a trait that derives from not being listened to not having someone that actually listens to what you have to say, hears you out and that later on manifest as you don’t think what you have to say is worth anybody’s time.
I’d say the third thing is for you to come to terms with, as a friend of somebody dealing with mental illness or any type of emotional traumas you’ll have to realize that there gonna be bad days. You know what some days you give up but the next day you’re back on the horse. You will just have to realize that your friend is trying their best. They do not want to be experiencing this all the time. You showing that you’re here and understanding it makes all the difference in the world. That actually helps create the culture of loving and caring individuals and people feeling like they can open up.
So many people out there in this world feel like they cannot open up and it’s just not true. You can open up, there are people that’ll listen you just gotta give it a shot but also on the other end you have to be someone to reach out. As a friend you need to realize that if you were going through something similar you would want your friend to do the exact same thing.
Just realize that i’m a person that wants to be heard just like you.