It is understandable to feel out of control of your emotions when they are at an all time high.Choosing your words wisely can be very difficult and to the person who is listening, it can sound like you’re attacking them personally.The best way when you are trying to vent, is let that other person know.
“I need to vent” and throwing in a “please don’t take any of this personally if it seems like I’m attacking you.”
When venting, sometimes we use general statements, like “people always” or “people never” Which can make the other person feel targeted. As the person who is being an ear for someone who is hurting, if they do not specify whether they need a solution or for you just to listen, ask.Many situations do not need to be rationalized or solved by the other person.Just listen and be empathetic.
And for the person venting, try your best not to attack your peer. It may cause an unintentional snowball, stressing the both of you out more.
Just try to be mindful, venting and lashing out can be a grey area.